Well, 7 days past due and nothing going on.
The midwife didn't do a pelvic exam at the last appointment - she's said in the past that they can just be frustrating and misleading anyway because I could be 3 cm dilated for 2 weeks or I could be totally not dilated and still end up going into labor the next day anyway.
In some ways the time has been nice because E and I finished all of the work that we had hoped to get done on the house and got work-stuff really organized. Now, it seems like we work for about 2-3 hours per day and finish everything. Now that we don't feel obligated to work on the house, the rest of the day is just "free time". How is it that life seemed so hectic before? I'm sure we'll still have our busy days. Obviously once Colby is born things will be a lot crazier but I love it that E and I run our own business from home and spend all day together - hence, we both sort of get to be stay-at-home-moms.
We have been going out on really long walks every evening though to try to work the little-guy down a bit. We don't really set a time or route but we seem to be walking for about 2 hours every day. There is a huge cemetary near our house and the view from the top of the hill is wonderful. There is also a huge maze of snowmobile trails behind the cemetary that seem to go forever in every direction. It is fun to talk about bringing Colby to these places when he gets older - the HUGE rock that we climb on, the fire-circle with the incredible view of the mountains, and the best places to spot large families of deer.
I don't know why but I really wanted Colby to be a MAY baby, not a JUNE baby. I'm trying to get over that though because it doesn't really look likely. Why is it that May and June just seem to have such different "moods" to them?
I keep reading all these articles online that say that the AVERAGE first-time mom will go 8 days past her due date. Why even bother with the other due date then? This would have been a lot easier if I'd just been counting down to tomorrow as my "due date" instead of 7 days ago.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Fun Photos!
We took some awesome photos on Monday. I had sort of wanted to get professional photos done but never really got around to it. Now that it is really getting "down to the wire" I decided to just set up the tripod in the bedroom (since the bed makes a fairly neutral uniform backdrop - and because it was cold/raining outside). My camera has a way to set the timer so that it will take photos at 1-second intervals and I could set the number of photos. We took 10 at a time and that gave us a chance to really just play around with poses and stuff. We were both in a really good mood and laughing constantly. I think this one is my favorite. The rest are here.Our friends M & B came over Monday night to henna my belly. I wasn't sure about that idea at first but I really like how it turned out. It was a lot of fun too. More fun henna photos here.
Monday, May 19, 2008
39w 3d and waiting
Well, I'm finally starting to get restless. Until just a few days ago, I was totally happy to have Colby right where he is. I really like being pregnant. I've had a really easy pregnancy and I know that I'm going to miss this experience when it is over.
A friend of ours is due any day now also and she said something that I liked - "This is the easiest part of parenting - I know exactly where he is and that all of his needs are being met" any of our inconveniences (feeling like I have to pee all the time!) are nothing compared to once he's on the outside.
Talking about being pregnant is so weird because the bad parts are so easy to describe in absolutely excruciating detail. Nausea, heartburn, constant pressure on the bladder, etc., etc. - I can say those things and everyone else knows more-or-less what that feels like. Watching my body build a human out of nothing more than the food that I eat and a set of blueprints too small to see under most microscopes - now that is crazy. There just aren't any words to describe that.
So, we're ready Colby, hurry up. I'll miss being pregnant but now I think we're ready to jump into the next step.
No exciting symptoms to report though - I hope I don't go way past my due date.
A friend of ours is due any day now also and she said something that I liked - "This is the easiest part of parenting - I know exactly where he is and that all of his needs are being met" any of our inconveniences (feeling like I have to pee all the time!) are nothing compared to once he's on the outside.
Talking about being pregnant is so weird because the bad parts are so easy to describe in absolutely excruciating detail. Nausea, heartburn, constant pressure on the bladder, etc., etc. - I can say those things and everyone else knows more-or-less what that feels like. Watching my body build a human out of nothing more than the food that I eat and a set of blueprints too small to see under most microscopes - now that is crazy. There just aren't any words to describe that.
So, we're ready Colby, hurry up. I'll miss being pregnant but now I think we're ready to jump into the next step.
No exciting symptoms to report though - I hope I don't go way past my due date.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Cold sore
The one damn thing that always kept popping into my head when people talked about fears of labor isn't the pain and suffering of giving birth or even emergencies that may come up. For me it was having a cold sore. Sounds silly at first but I've heard that babies can catch them and end up with chronic open sores all over their skin. I need to actually research that better but I've been worried that I'll get a cold sore, possibly just from the stress of a labor, and not be able to kiss my baby for 7-14 days. I'd also have to be incredibly diligent about washing my hands, not touching my face, etc. What if I screwed up and kissed him without thinking or felt like maybe I didn't wash my hands enough? It would suck. I'm not saying that I'm never going to have a cold sore again but I'd really prefer not to have to deal with that in the first week (or two, or three).
So what showed up on my lip today? Yup, a cold sore.
Maybe this is good though. I rarely get them back-to-back (though it has happened) so now I've got about 14 days to deal with this one and may be less likely to get another one right away. So, ok, I can deal with this... it still annoys me.
So what showed up on my lip today? Yup, a cold sore.
Maybe this is good though. I rarely get them back-to-back (though it has happened) so now I've got about 14 days to deal with this one and may be less likely to get another one right away. So, ok, I can deal with this... it still annoys me.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Very Long Post on Home (or Natural) Birth
So, obviously I've been thinking about birth a lot lately. Why is having a home birth important to me?
We watched The Business of Being Born yesterday and while I did enjoy it, I found that I didn't agree with everything that they said. I started thinking about what I do and don't believe about birth in general... of course many of these things may change after I actually experience giving birth but I'm just talking about how I feel right now.
Several people in the movie said something like "birth is a rite of passage" as if that automatically made it more valuable. I do not believe that natural child birth is inherently valuable just because it can be called a "rite of passage". Our culture has many positive rites of passage such as a marriage or graduation ceremony. There are also (what I consider) harsh or negative rites of passage though like a severe beating as initiation into a gang, fraternity/sorority hazing, and even "basic training" in the military is set up to be a rite of passage (among other things).
Oddly, the fraternities, gangs, and military have hit on something that nature "already knew" - the traumatic experience often does make a person or group feel more bonded, loyal and strong. So, in some senses, it does serve a very real purpose in childbirth. Yet, at the same time, hazing is illegal (in all states?) and I was horrified to read about gang members beating their friends (often 13 or 14 years old) nearly to death for no reason other than to "initiate" them. Birth is not a feminist "macho thing" for proving a point. Women should not feel like they have to endure labor in order to be respected as a mother or feel like a failure if they don't end up with a natural birth. To me, when people say "rite of passage", I feel like they're saying - "you must endure this beating in order to get into the mommy club." Labor is not a natural hazing ritual or initiation. However, those odd benefits of strength, commitment, and loyalty that come with enduring trauma can not be overlooked as completely trivial either.
I do not believe that most doctors just want to turn beds over quickly. I prefer to think that doctors really want to relieve pain. That is why they are doctors. They like solving problems, not just sitting there and watching someone suffer (or go through what looks to them like suffering). They may feel that a shorter or less painful labor is really the most "humane" thing even if it does carry some increased risks. They also may be aware of the risk of a malpractice lawsuit and know that doing something puts you at a far lower risk of being sued than doing nothing.
I don't believe that hospitals are "bad". I believe that the majority of people who work there do genuinely want to help. It may be very common for doctors or nurses to push drugs or c-sections more often when they are tired or anxious to go home but I would still prefer to think of those as mostly sub-conscious decisions rather than blatantly selfish ones.
Ok, so what do I believe are my reasons for choosing a home birth?
Over 30% of births in the US are via Cesarean Section. The World Health Organization states that no region in the world is justified in having a cesarean rate greater than 10 to 15 percent. The US has the second-worst infant mortality rate of all developed nations. If you only look at the 7 countries with the highest populations, the US has the highest cesarean rate, the lowest number of births attended by midwives, the lowest number of home births and the worst infant mortality rate. In the 5 European countries with the lowest infant mortality rates, midwives attend more than 70% of the births.
Studies of planned home births by low-risk women, attended by a trained professional, indicate that home birth is at least as safe as hospital birth (See WHO research here section 2.4 Place of Birth).
Hospital labors tend to be longer, on average, than home labors. My theory - many people can't even pee with someone watching or listening. If the body needs a safe, private environment just to pee, it seems logical that women would prefer not to labor with a million strangers coming and going, bright lights, and strange noises.
Many women who had hoped to have a natural birth in a hospital setting find that their labor will not progress without pitocin. The contractions produced by pitocin are much longer and stronger than natural contractions so women almost always need an epidural to cope once pitocin is given.
If the woman started out wanting an epidural from the start, that often slows contractions so pitocin would likely follow.
The epidural is applied directly to the spine specifically so that the mom gets the drugs but baby doesn't. The pain relief means that mom's body stops producing the endorphins and other natural stamina and pain-management drugs that would normally flow both to her and to the baby.
Side effects of the drugs, stronger and longer contractions, lack of maternal endorphins, etc. all make the labor significantly more difficult for baby to handle. The baby is then far more likely to go into distress and require an emergency C-section.
I have read that women who give birth naturally have far lower rates of post-partum depression. The insane cocktail of hormones released during labor is like a runner's high times ten (or more) and helps women to feel like they can conquer anything. Those hormones also help to tell the woman's body that it is time to start producing milk. Women who have a natural birth tend to have a significantly easier time with breastfeeding (especially vs moms who had a c-section). It seems logical that women who are really struggling with breastfeeding would also be more likely to feel inadequate as a new mom. Some studies also suggest that those natural chemicals produced during labor trigger an intense bonding mechanism. A mother's reduced ability to bond with her baby could also lead to depression.
Trading one day of insane pain for increased risk to the baby's health, increased discomfort for the baby, and months of struggling with breastfeeding, bonding, and depression just doesn't sound like a great trade-off to me.
Well, we'll see how I feel about this 3 weeks from now (assuming I've birthed the little guy by then). These are just my feelings about it all now and it helps me to get them all down in a logical order. I know mid-labor is full of doubts and second thoughts so having a very clear idea of why I'm doing this should help.
We watched The Business of Being Born yesterday and while I did enjoy it, I found that I didn't agree with everything that they said. I started thinking about what I do and don't believe about birth in general... of course many of these things may change after I actually experience giving birth but I'm just talking about how I feel right now.
Several people in the movie said something like "birth is a rite of passage" as if that automatically made it more valuable. I do not believe that natural child birth is inherently valuable just because it can be called a "rite of passage". Our culture has many positive rites of passage such as a marriage or graduation ceremony. There are also (what I consider) harsh or negative rites of passage though like a severe beating as initiation into a gang, fraternity/sorority hazing, and even "basic training" in the military is set up to be a rite of passage (among other things).
Oddly, the fraternities, gangs, and military have hit on something that nature "already knew" - the traumatic experience often does make a person or group feel more bonded, loyal and strong. So, in some senses, it does serve a very real purpose in childbirth. Yet, at the same time, hazing is illegal (in all states?) and I was horrified to read about gang members beating their friends (often 13 or 14 years old) nearly to death for no reason other than to "initiate" them. Birth is not a feminist "macho thing" for proving a point. Women should not feel like they have to endure labor in order to be respected as a mother or feel like a failure if they don't end up with a natural birth. To me, when people say "rite of passage", I feel like they're saying - "you must endure this beating in order to get into the mommy club." Labor is not a natural hazing ritual or initiation. However, those odd benefits of strength, commitment, and loyalty that come with enduring trauma can not be overlooked as completely trivial either.
I do not believe that most doctors just want to turn beds over quickly. I prefer to think that doctors really want to relieve pain. That is why they are doctors. They like solving problems, not just sitting there and watching someone suffer (or go through what looks to them like suffering). They may feel that a shorter or less painful labor is really the most "humane" thing even if it does carry some increased risks. They also may be aware of the risk of a malpractice lawsuit and know that doing something puts you at a far lower risk of being sued than doing nothing.
I don't believe that hospitals are "bad". I believe that the majority of people who work there do genuinely want to help. It may be very common for doctors or nurses to push drugs or c-sections more often when they are tired or anxious to go home but I would still prefer to think of those as mostly sub-conscious decisions rather than blatantly selfish ones.
Ok, so what do I believe are my reasons for choosing a home birth?
Over 30% of births in the US are via Cesarean Section. The World Health Organization states that no region in the world is justified in having a cesarean rate greater than 10 to 15 percent. The US has the second-worst infant mortality rate of all developed nations. If you only look at the 7 countries with the highest populations, the US has the highest cesarean rate, the lowest number of births attended by midwives, the lowest number of home births and the worst infant mortality rate. In the 5 European countries with the lowest infant mortality rates, midwives attend more than 70% of the births.
Studies of planned home births by low-risk women, attended by a trained professional, indicate that home birth is at least as safe as hospital birth (See WHO research here section 2.4 Place of Birth).
Hospital labors tend to be longer, on average, than home labors. My theory - many people can't even pee with someone watching or listening. If the body needs a safe, private environment just to pee, it seems logical that women would prefer not to labor with a million strangers coming and going, bright lights, and strange noises.
Many women who had hoped to have a natural birth in a hospital setting find that their labor will not progress without pitocin. The contractions produced by pitocin are much longer and stronger than natural contractions so women almost always need an epidural to cope once pitocin is given.
If the woman started out wanting an epidural from the start, that often slows contractions so pitocin would likely follow.
The epidural is applied directly to the spine specifically so that the mom gets the drugs but baby doesn't. The pain relief means that mom's body stops producing the endorphins and other natural stamina and pain-management drugs that would normally flow both to her and to the baby.
Side effects of the drugs, stronger and longer contractions, lack of maternal endorphins, etc. all make the labor significantly more difficult for baby to handle. The baby is then far more likely to go into distress and require an emergency C-section.
I have read that women who give birth naturally have far lower rates of post-partum depression. The insane cocktail of hormones released during labor is like a runner's high times ten (or more) and helps women to feel like they can conquer anything. Those hormones also help to tell the woman's body that it is time to start producing milk. Women who have a natural birth tend to have a significantly easier time with breastfeeding (especially vs moms who had a c-section). It seems logical that women who are really struggling with breastfeeding would also be more likely to feel inadequate as a new mom. Some studies also suggest that those natural chemicals produced during labor trigger an intense bonding mechanism. A mother's reduced ability to bond with her baby could also lead to depression.
Trading one day of insane pain for increased risk to the baby's health, increased discomfort for the baby, and months of struggling with breastfeeding, bonding, and depression just doesn't sound like a great trade-off to me.
Well, we'll see how I feel about this 3 weeks from now (assuming I've birthed the little guy by then). These are just my feelings about it all now and it helps me to get them all down in a logical order. I know mid-labor is full of doubts and second thoughts so having a very clear idea of why I'm doing this should help.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Still not quite ready but getting there (37 1/2 weeks)
Our house still isn't QUITE finished yet.... but I am so amazed by how close we are. The trim isn't finished, we need closet doors, etc. but here is a photo of the almost finished master bedroom.
Friday, May 2, 2008
37 weeks - Full term
Full term - yikes! He could, technically, come any day now. Most first-time moms go a little late though so I'm pretty sure we've got a few weeks left.
I don't know why this strikes me as so funny but we've ordered this pool from a home birth supply company. 
It just seems funny to think of delivering a baby among brightly-colored fishies. I'm not entirely sure that I'll even want to deliver Colby in the pool but it was only $30 and we were ordering some other stuff from the company at the same time so I figured what-the-heck. Our midwife has a sump pump that we can borrow so the plan is to just set this up right in our living room. I was somewhat reassured by the fact that our midwife said this is the exact same pool that she delivered her daughter in and that she was very happy with it.
It just seems funny to think of delivering a baby among brightly-colored fishies. I'm not entirely sure that I'll even want to deliver Colby in the pool but it was only $30 and we were ordering some other stuff from the company at the same time so I figured what-the-heck. Our midwife has a sump pump that we can borrow so the plan is to just set this up right in our living room. I was somewhat reassured by the fact that our midwife said this is the exact same pool that she delivered her daughter in and that she was very happy with it.It came with a little net - the kind you use to take dead fish out of the aquarium - for "light debris"... I don't think I want to know what "light debris" is. Ahh, this should be exciting.
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